Tragic Biz-Speak o’ The Day

I am a content creator. Apparently. I used to be a writer, but according to current biz-speak I create content. Which is fine — when I say I’m a writer, the very next question is always “Oh? What do you write?” I could say anything I wanted there — I used to say “Bodice rippers!” but I had to keep explaining what a bodice was. “Whatever I’m paid to write” used to sound tacky and soulless; in these troubled times, there’s something almost heroic about it: “I used to be an ARTISTE! But my children enjoy eating. I’ll write on the bathroom walls if it gets me a paycheck.”

But say “Content Creator” in the marketing world and people automatically think of social media: blog etries, Facebook posts, Tweets, etc. Content Creators are people who understand how to communicate online — valuable skill!

So what possible excuse could a content marketing company have to put this on their “About” page:

ContentCo. Inc. is an award-winning, full-service custom publishing group that provides relevant, integrated communication solutions. We employ proven publishing processes and strategies that ensure your editorial is engaging and action-oriented and that your design is fresh and innovative. We are committed to providing clients with the best in custom content creation. To achieve this, we identify and continually benchmark against your communications and business objectives, proactively bring you forward-thinking content ideas, create detailed Edit maps and follow a proven publishing process that focuses on timeliness and quality.


So, um… somebody want to march that down the hall to Marcie the blogger? Who could improve it just by spilling her coffee on it?

But no. The About Us page is not content. Duh. Its a jargon delivery device, providing purpose-built communication solutions for information exchange between clients and corporate personnel. So why bother Marcie the Blogger with it? “We’ll just bring it up at the next Board meeting and work out what it should say. How hard could it be?”

Tragic. Just tragic.



Filed under Extra! Extra!

2 responses to “Tragic Biz-Speak o’ The Day

  1. I could not finish the paragraph. Much like how i can’t stop giggling uncontrollably when someone says “webinar” or “cafetorium” at work, that paragraph cannot be taken seriously.

    Wait, what do they do? Apparently “creating content” and “creating something anyone wants to read” are not the same thing.

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